Dismantled
A Memoir on Identity and Survial
By Joe Butler
Dismantled
Dismantled is a memoir about mouth cancer, surgery, survival, trauma, humour, fatherhood, identity, and the strange work of rebuilding a life after being physically taken apart.
At 27, I was diagnosed with stage IVa mouth cancer despite having no known risk factors. What followed was a 16 hour operation, the removal and reconstruction of part of my tongue, eight weeks of chemoradiotherapy, and a recovery that did not end when treatment did.
This is not a tidy inspirational survival story.
It is honest, darkly funny, painful, blunt, and human – a book about fear, scars, hospitals, family, grief, stubbornness, bad jokes, and the ordinary life fought for on the other side.
About the Book
Dismantled begins with a promise.
Over a decade after treatment, my 5 year old daughter asked me what would happen if I wasn't there anymore. I promised her the truth - not the softened version, not the neat version, but the real account of what it cost to build the life she lives in.
The book returns to the beginning; the dental appointment I almost cancelled, the white mark on my tongue, the biopsy that should have been nothing, and the diagnosis that changed everything.
From there, Dismantled follows the full journey; surgery, hospital wards, treatment, recovery, trauma, humour, family, fear, identity, and the long aftermath of surviving something that never fully leaves.
The Story
The first thing I wrote after waking from surgery was;
How is the other driver?
There was no other driver. There was me, a hospital bed, a rebuilt tongue, a hole in my neck, and a brain trying to make sense of what had happened.
That sentance became one of the anchors of Dismantled: strange, frightening, absurb, and somehow funny - which is exactly how much of survival felt.
The book talks about cancer, but that is just the mechanism that brought the fight to me. The book talks about everything that trauma touches, identity, marriage, parenting, work, body image, fear, friendship, grief, and the ordinary things that become extraordinary when you have had to fight your way back to them.
Why I Wrote it and Why Now
I wrote Dismantled because survival if often told too neatly.
People talk about getting through it, beating it, moving on. But the truth is more complicated than that. Sometimes survival is ugly. Sometimes it is funny. Sometimes it is boring, lonely, frightening, ridiculous, and full of moments nobody warns you about.
I wanted to write the version I needed when I was 27.
I wanted to write something useful for the person sitting in the hospital room at the start of it.
And I wanted to leave something honest for my children - proof I was here, that I tried, that I loved them, and that the life we built is what carries me through every scar.
Literary & Publishing Enquiries
Dismantled is complete and currently being submitted to literary agents.
For literary agents, publishers, editors, rights contacts, or professional publishing enquiries, please use the contact form. Please include your name, agency or organisation, reason for contact, and any relevant deadlines.
ARC & Review Copy Interest
Early review copies are not currently available while Dismantled is being submitted.
However, book reviewers, bloggers, podcasters, health advocates, charities, patient voices, and early readers are welcome to register their interest for future updates and possible review copy oppourtunities.
Awareness, Media & Speaking
Alongside writing Dismantled, I speak about mouth cancer awareness, early detection, patient experience, recovery, and life after treatment.
I am an ambassador for the Oral Health Foundation and have spoken publicly about mouth cancer awareness and patient experience, including at the Houses of Parliment for the launch of the Mouth Cancer Charter.
For podcast invitations, media enquiries, interviews, charity events, awareness campaigns, panels, or speaking requests, please use the contact form and select the relevant enquiry type.
For Readers
If you are here because you or someone you love has been affected by cancer, surgery, chemotherapy, radiotherapy, trauma, recovery, or the long strange aftermath of survival - you are welcome here.
Dismantled is not medical advice.
It's one person's account of being taken apart and rebuilt, physically and otherwise. It is a story about what happened, what helped, what hurt, what stayed, and what life looked like after the emergency ended.